


unspoken, unsteady

by milktoast_mcgee



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Boys Kissing, Brotherhood: Final Fantasy XV, Fantasizing, Feelings Realization, Hand Jobs, I have no idea what else to tag this with, IgNoct, M/M, Mutual Pining, he is a lonely boy and wants to hold ignis and also wants to be held!!!, noct struggles to figure out his feelings, whispers ignoct
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:20:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28660119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milktoast_mcgee/pseuds/milktoast_mcgee
Summary: Noctis didn't know when he started feeling it. But as the distance between him and Ignis grows, the more he realizes he needs him. He needs him more than words can say. It leaves him tossing and turning in bed at night. It leaves him staring at his phone. It leaves him desperate to hold him close and never, ever, ever let him go. The silence between them burns and burns until, finally, something breaks."Please," Ignis nearly begs him. "Please tell me what you need, Noct."
Relationships: Noctis Lucis Caelum/Ignis Scientia
Comments: 7
Kudos: 85





	unspoken, unsteady

He didn't know when it started.

Maybe it was back when they were kids. Maybe it was the very moment they met, when his father introduced them, when Ignis -- his back straight, shirt too pressed to be worn by a child, his face at once so stern but so vulnerable as he held his hand out to Noctis with a careful handshake. And he'd grabbed his hand with both his own and smiled. Ignis smiled back. Maybe it was then, right there, right from the start.

Maybe it was when he used to read stories to him at night. Ignis got so wrapped up in even old fairytales, nestled beside Noct, neither of them eager to sleep. He would do voices for each character, only to catch himself and try to regain his composure, flashing his companion a smile that made his heart flutter every time.

Maybe it was how, as the years went on, duty drew them closer but also pushed them further apart. Council meetings, rigorous training. When Ignis joined the Crownsguard. When Noctis begrudgingly accepted the growing, official demands of his royal duties. 

Ignis helped him with every one without complaint. He helped him with practically everything, like he always had. He pressed his shirts and righted his clothes. He brought over groceries or cleaned Noct's apartment. Even all throughout his schooling, Noct had sometimes asked for Ignis's help tutoring him. It was tutoring he didn't really need, except for the chance to sit beside him. Something he needed more and more the further Ignis drifted away from him.

Maybe it was when he was across from him during a stuffy High Council meeting. How poised he sat as light filtered in through the windows. How deftly his pen moved as he took notes he'd no doubt use to quiz Noctis later. How he'd taken to styling his hair, how he always looked so put together, how rare his smiles became and -- every time -- every time he did see him smile, Noctis felt a deep, painful longing inside him for... something.

He didn't know when it started. No matter how much he tried to ignore it, it ached. It burned. It left him twisting and turning at night, dreaming about the time he could finally pull him close and, and --

Seated alone at the table, it struck him just how quiet his apartment was. Even the sprawling Insomnia beyond its walls, known for its nightlife, seemed far too quiet. He figured the noodles were ready, and even if they weren't, it didn't really matter. It wasn't like Ignis would come over so late to make dinner. Or spend time with him because he wanted to.

The noodles were cold by the time he remembered they were there in front of him. He ate them slowly, mechanically. They didn't taste like anything. The TV chattered across the room. Video games and food wrappers scattered the floor. He heard Ignis chide him in his memory, moving to gather up the trash and right the apartment once more. It felt right when he was around. Noctis felt too heavy at the table. Though he finished the noodles, he continued to stare in the overwhelming silence.

The sudden buzz of his phone was too loud. He spied where he'd left it on the couch. It buzzed again. The little hum echoed in the dim apartment as he went to pick up his phone. He swallowed hard. Two messages from Ignis. A million things flashed through his mind -- all of them tied tight with that hard, unfamiliar longing -- before he read them.

"I hope you're doing well. Apologies for texting so late."  
"I'll be stopping by tomorrow morning with some groceries. Is there anything you'd like in particular?"

Before Noctis could sigh and set the phone back down, it buzzed again.

"Would you mind if I called?"

Noct stared at the screen. His fingers wouldn't move. Another message soon appeared.

"I will see you tomorrow, then."

Despite himself, he scrambled. He tapped the screen, and again, and the line began to ring. His head pounded. The apartment somehow got even more quiet. The ringing stopped. When he heard his voice, his heart thudded hard in his chest.

"Oh, hello." The gentle surprise in his voice was clear. "Evening, Noct. Are you feeling alright?"  
Noctis tried to speak. But he choked on all the words and all the feelings stuck and tangled up inside him. He managed little more than a grunt. "Yeah."  
"I hope you don't mind me messaging you so late. I wanted to at least let you know I'll be over tomorrow, if that's fine with you."  
Noct bit his lip. His face stung. His throat wouldn't cooperate to form any more words other than another feeble grunt. "...sure."

He could feel it. The distance compounded between them. Every passing second of silence in the dim, lonely apartment pushed them a little further apart. Noct gripped the phone tightly. He took a sharp breath and tried to steady himself and -- what could he say? How could he tell him everything he had all twisted up inside him?

"Noct." Ignis's voice was soft and made it hurt so, so much more. "Did you want to discuss anything?"  
"Yeah." He bit his lip again and shook his head. "Not really. Sorry."  
Ignis chuckled warmly. "There's no need to apologize. It's nice to hear from you."  
Noct's voice failed him again. "Yeah."  
"You..." Ignis paused as if he could see Noct's eyes close, could see him sitting on the couch and folding further into himself. Even with the phone so close to his ear, Noct could barely hear his voice, gentle and steady. "You can call me whenever you like, if you need anything at all."  
I want you here, Noct begged himself to say. I really, really need you here. "Yeah."

The other end was quiet. The silence burned. The long couch was too big and too empty and he curled into himself even more. He must have made some pathetic little noise because he heard Ignis again.

"Are you sure you're alright?"  
"I just," Noctis tried, but his voice was too loud, too useless to say anything he wanted. He sighed instead. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine."  
Ignis chuckled again, but there was something undeniably fragile in his voice. "Well, then. I'll be by tomorrow--"  
"Wait, I..."

Noctis cursed himself. He shook his head quickly. Ignis waited for him to say anything -- anything he needed to say -- but Noct only managed a weak laugh.

"Nevermind. I'm just gonna sleep. 'Night."

Ignis said something back, but Noct ended the call before he could hear it. His feelings ripped through him, threaded through his bones like wire, pulling harder and harder in the silence. He sat curled up on the couch for a long while. He stared at the messy floor and the muttering TV. A deluge of thoughts kept him awake too long. 

If he'd asked, would Ignis have said yes? Would he have driven over so late at night to accompany him? Would he stay? Would he join Noct on the couch and hold him close when the lights went out and even Insomnia fell asleep?

He growled, clutching the phone to his chest. "Damn it."

\--

It was another one of those nights. 

He tossed and turned. He longed for a body next to his. He wanted to feel Ignis's hands. To feel his arms slip around him. Ignis pulling up his shirt to spread his warm, lovely hands all over Noctis's skin. Beneath the covers, he shivered. 

Dreams threaded through the desperate longing to feel his body naked against his own. To push his hips to his and hear him moaning his name. To hear him breathless and needy. Wrapping arms around him tight and never, ever letting him go, never giving way to the distance growing between them day by day.

In the dark, he knew exactly what he wanted. A hand slipped down along his belly and he pretended it belonged to Ignis. Gently grasping him. Lips brushed against his ear. Whispering his name. Rocking hips against his in time with careful strokes. His body warm nestled beside his.

Noctis moaned his name. He needed Ignis to hear it, even in a dream. Holding him close. Protecting him as always. In the dark, he could say what he needed. I need you, he said. I need you here, he said. Please, please, please, he begged, don't let me go.

\--

He blinked awake to his phone buzzing in the morning, but he couldn't bring himself to check it.

He heard the patter of rain beyond his apartment window. Beyond the walls of his apartment, the city was left muted by the rain. Some time later, he looked at his phone. It was nine-thirty. Two texts from Ignis. Noctis almost called him, but he stopped himself. Thinking about the sound of his voice was too much. He closed his eyes again. It was easier to try to sleep when it was bright out, to save himself from his own feelings.

At ten exactly, a knock came to the front door. Noctis bolted upright in his bed. Though he threw off the covers, he grew still. His ears burned as he listened close. He could hear him. Gently shutting the door, setting something down in the kitchen. Pausing to remove his coat, maybe briefly frowning at his wet hair from the rain. Maybe pausing to look down the hall toward Noct's room, hoping to glimpse him asleep. Maybe coming to try and to wake him for a proper breakfast with a gentle hand on his shoulder.

He listened. Footsteps didn't come down the hall. A polite knock didn't come to the door of his room. He heard instead the typical rustle of some cleaning, of movement in the kitchen. Noct kicked himself out of bed, but once again stopped himself. He couldn't run into the kitchen, throw his arms around him, and confess just as he had everything in his sleep. Noct sighed. He smoothed his shirt and messy hair. With some ungraceful steps, he reached the door. 

For a too-long while, he watched him from the hall. Two bags of groceries sat on the floor. Ignis didn't pause to find a place for anything; he knew exactly where to put a box of this, a bag of that. Watching him, he seemed like he was home. His coat was hanging near the door. He easily could have put the coffee machine going. He could start breakfast for them both. They could spend the whole morning talking in the gray morning light. The low light found Ignis's hair, slightly wet from the rain. The same light also found his glasses when he turned to finally notice Noctis staring at him.

"Noct," he said. His smile was careful but still made something twist tight inside the prince. "Good morning. I hope I didn't wake you."

Noctis shrugged. He found his arms folded, found himself leaning against the wall as he watched Ignis once again at work. The floor was cold under the prince's bare feet. Even though he'd just emerged from bed, he felt underdressed as ever compared to his advisor. Ignis was obviously ready for another long day of meetings and other business at the Citadel. He had the sleeves of his shirt rolled up some, and Noctis couldn't help but stare. His arms, his wrists, his hands and his careful fingers -- even as he did something so mundane as open a cabinet or tug at his sleeves, the young prince was mesmerized.

"My apologies."

Noct shifted on his feet. He scratched at his head and attempted to right his mess of hair before he spoke.

"No, I was already awake," Noctis said.  
"Ah." Ignis's tone was hard to place. "In any case, I'll not be much longer."  
"Sure." Noct hated his own voice and how fragile it was in the bleary, rainy morning light, but he had to continue. "You don't have to hurry, or whatever."

A strange silence reigned over the apartment once more. Rain rattled beyond the walls. Ignis remained still near the counter. The morning glare caught his glasses, his bright eyes. He tugged down his sleeves. He muttered something so softly his lips barely moved.

"Perhaps I should."  
Noctis bristled. "What?"  
Ignis readjusted his glasses and regained his composure. "I'll be taking notes for several city development meetings throughout the day. You're expected at the Citadel this afternoon, as well, if you hope to make an appearance."  
Shrugging again, Noctis grumbled. "Yeah."

The silence grew bigger, heavier. It congealed in the gray morning between them. Ignis placed the last of the groceries in the refrigerator. 

"Noct."

When he turned to face Noctis once more, the prince froze just paces from the counter, leaving him anchored in a deep, silent sea. It kept raining. As the rain grew louder, the silence burned. Ignis cleared his throat. He kept his eyes fixed on the door, refusing to meet the prince's gaze. His expression was hard to place. Careful. Concerned. The same caution found his voice.

"If there's something we should discuss..."

Noctis shook his head. He dislodged himself from his spot on the floor and made for the counter. Unsteady hands fought for the cabinet. He found a can of coffee and its accompanying container of sugar and set them down with a too-loud clatter. His voice fell heavy and hollow.

"Whatever. Make breakfast or something if you want."  
"Hmm."

The silence mocked them. The gray morning darkened with the heavy rain, drowning the kitchen in shadow. Ignis, after a moment's pause, went for the kitchen light switch. He brushed past Noctis at the counter and the prince was left paralyzed once more -- the warmth of his body, so painfully close but so far away. With a flick of the switch, light poured into the room. Ignis turned to face him, but Noct couldn't hope to meet his eyes, especially with the thinly-veiled hurt in his voice.

"I'll be going, then."  
Noct's hands clutched the edge of the counter. He couldn't find his voice. "You don't have to."  
Ignis gave pause. "You'd like me to make breakfast for you?"  
"No," Noctis nearly growled. "Just... whatever."

In response, Ignis sighed quietly. He turned away and moved toward the door. Noctis could finally lift his eyes to watch his long legs, his steps half stiff and uneven. Disjointed. Drifting in the strange silence that trapped them both. When he spoke again, he chuckled quietly, his voice grim.

"I... I don't know what I've done to upset you, but..."

Noctis had to steady himself against the counter. Was he trembling? He looked down at his hands and they seemed so far away, but Ignis was even further away, drifting beyond the horizon with each second. The prince swallowed hard. He tried to find any words but he could barely move. He gazed at Ignis's back. Ignis was still. The young advisor shook his head.

"If you'd prefer for me to keep my distance, you only need let me know. I can only surmise so much. So, please..."

Something pounded too hard and too heavy. Noctis couldn't tell if it was the rain or his heart in his chest. He knew what he had to say. He knew what he had to say and had said it already so, so many times in the dark, alone, twisting and turning in bed. But he swallowed hard again and no words emerged. His throat burned. He could only stare at Ignis's back and drown in the roar of the rain and his own heartbeat.

"Please tell me what you need, Noct."

The care he used to say his name, the concern in his voice, made Noctis move from the counter. The deep, heavy sea of silence pushed back against him, but he kept moving, one step and another. Ignis was so far away, but close -- so close. Gazing at him. Noctis reached for him. His both hands found his shirt. His fingers splayed themselves upon his chest. Ignis stiffened. Noctis could feel the gentle warmth of his skin and the hitch in his breath and --

And then, something broke.

Noctis pushed forward. His lips first found Ignis's cheek -- of course, he would screw it up, but he didn't have the mind to care. He quickly realigned himself before Ignis could attempt escape, before Noct had to face any consequence. Damn the consequences. The sea came crashing down. His pounding heart echoed long as it shuddered still. Their lips collided too hot and too heavy. A shiver rattled through them both. Whether it first belonged to him or Ignis didn't matter either.

Eyes snapping open, Noct jerked back. He still had his hands firmly planted on Ignis's chest. His stiff fingers gripped his shirt tightly, wrinkling the neat fabric. Ignis's eyes were open, too. He was close, closer than ever, and Noctis couldn't help but marvel at just how pretty he was. He knew well his scattered freckles, his sharp and studious eyes, lips always so careful -- lips he'd only just kissed. Noct's heart rattled hard in his chest. His hands found his face. His fingers slipped to the back of his head, threading through strands of soft, sandy hair.

Ignis's expression was implacable as ever, but his green eyes were wide. His lips parted with a sharp breath, like he'd only then remembered how to breathe. Those lips quickly drew Noctis in again. He sighed against him, his own mouth easing Ignis's open a little further. It was definitely Ignis who shivered then. As Noct pulled him closer, he felt his chest tense with another sharp breath. The prince pulled back some, wide eyes full only of Ignis's own, but he couldn't stay away. 

He kissed him. His mouth was hot. His lips were so soft against his own. His tongue slid along Ignis's soft lips, causing the young advisor to gasp. He tugged back suddenly and Noctis's hands retreated. Noct stumbled backward. The two or three steps could easily become another mile at sea. He was dizzy. His wide eyes refused to stray from Ignis, even if it meant seeing rejection, or disgust, or anything else.

Ignis slowly raised one of his hands. Normally so steady, unsure fingers touched his face. The kitchen's light easily found the gentle red dusting his cheeks. He blinked. His lips moved but found no words, as if Noct's had left them numb. He managed only another huff, a sigh.

"...ah."

Noctis choked on his own voice. His hands dug into his hair as he struggled to speak. "I, oh, u-uhhh, Ignis, I, damn it, I, I just, fff-fh..."

He stepped back until he bumped the kitchen counter. His hands crept to his heated face. Though the rain continued pouring, silence burned throughout the apartment. Noct couldn't breathe. His shoulders shook. He didn't hear Ignis step toward him. When careful hands found his arms, gently prying his own hands from his face, he jerked upright. The edges of his vision blurred. The warm light of the kitchen framed Ignis's face before him. He could feel his sharp eyes on him, searching his face for a long while.

"Is this," he said slowly, hands gently grasping those of the prince. "Is this what you mean to... tell me?"

Noct swallowed hard. Before he could manage some response, something interrupted him. Both he and Ignis jumped at the sound. Their eyes together quickly found Ignis's coat near the door. An alarm on his phone rang steadily. It wasn't set to a loud volume, but it rippled through the aching silence, through their hands joined together. Ignis drew back slightly.

"I should--" he began, only for Noct's arms to catch him. 

The prince pulled him close, their bodies pushed together, as his lips found his once more. His arms fit so easily around him. His hands dug into Ignis's back. Noct broke away only to take a breath, only to glimpse a flutter of eyelashes before him. Ignis let out a shaky breath. His own hands gingerly settled at Noct's sides, but it wasn't enough. One of Noctis's hands twisted fingers into his light hair. He tugged strands tight, just enough to tilt his head and prise his mouth open further. The phone continued ringing. Rain crashed beyond the walls. Noctis's own heartbeat thudded in his head. All the noise meant nothing when their tongues slid together and Ignis gave a soft, voiceless moan.

His lips were soft. His tongue was so hot and slick against his own. Ignis's hands settled softly at Noctis's waist. The prince groaned. He shoved his hips against him in reply, pulling another hitched breath from Ignis. Their lips broke apart for a moment as the alarm fell quiet. Silence was punctuated by heavy breath and heaving chests. Noct's fingers soaked in the warmth of his skin through his shirt, tracing the lines of his shoulderblades. His grip slid down his back and his hands gripped firm at his hips. His knee pushed between Ignis's legs to draw him even closer. Ignis gasped, eyes suddenly wide.

"N-Noct..."  
"Damn it," Noctis hissed. His hips rocked against him, hands digging into his hips. Ignis's own gripped him harder. His shiver against him sent a sharp, warm twinge below his waist. He breathed hard, capturing the advisor's lips once more. "H-hhah, just..."

Noct's hips moved on their own. He gripped Ignis's sides tighter to draw their bodies hard together. Ignis was so close. He was so close and so warm, the painful distance between them shattered. With his leg between both his, he could feel his thighs tense, his hips rolling against the prince's in reply. Noct grunted and cursed the shirts and pants that separated them. He sighed against Ignis's lips as a hand moved along his waist. Ignis's palm slid south. 

Careful fingers brushed the growing stiffness pulling the loose fabric of his sleeping pants. Ignis's breath hitched. His other hand retreated quickly to adjust his glasses. Bright green eyes found him for a moment, only to just as quickly look away. Before his other hand could leave Noct's waist, the prince snatched him by the wrist. 

"Please," Noct nearly whined, rocking his hips against him in languid rhythm. He drew back to bite his lip but he couldn't hold back another dizzy demand. "...please, I..."

Ignis let a careful breath. His other arm settled around Noctis. The prince shuddered as slowly, carefully, slender fingers slipped beneath the band of his pants. His touch drew a line of flames beneath his skin. Noct couldn't help but gasp when fingertips brushed the trail of coarse, dark hair below his navel, drawing a line to the base of his length. The heat of his gentle fingers wrapped around him caused Noct's head to tip back. Ignis's head settled softly at his shoulder. He was so warm, his breath hot and uneven against his neck.

"Is this alright," he asked quietly. The hand at Noct's back slipped underneath his shirt and he sighed as his palm slid flat along his skin. The fingers wrapped around his length loosened to draw a slow, thoughtful line along it. Noctis's hips twitched and his erection ached and throbbed enough to draw the sigh of a question from Ignis once more. "...is this--"  
"Please, Ignis." The prince's hips bucked into his hand, chasing the heat of his grasp. His own arms wrapped around the young advisor. Hands digging into his back, the words hissed through his teeth. "J-just, just... h--ahh..."

Ignis shifted. Noct felt himself leaning harder against the counter, unable to support his own weight anymore. Ignis's arm around him, hand settled at the small of his back, kept him rooted in reality -- not some dream during a sleepless night, some hopeless fantasy. Ignis was there. Ignis was holding him. Ignis's lips pressed a soft kiss to his neck. His fingertips were light upon Noct's length, straining in his sleeping pants. Noctis shoved into his grasp again. Ignis's hand wrapped around him and Noct shuddered. As his gentle grasp moved along his length, Ignis gave pause.

"Noct..."

Noctis's whole body twinged. Ignis's thumb found the head of his dick. His length throbbed harder under Ignis's scrutiny as his fingers smeared the clear, beading want at the tip. Ignis drew back his hand slowly. Noct groaned aloud, shoving up in hopes of finding his hand again. Instead, Ignis brought up his hand. His sharp eyes caught the dull sheen of precum on his fingers. He let a ragged breath as his tongue slid over them, his eyes falling closed. When his hand ventured below Noct's waist again, when slickened fingers wrapped hot around his aching dick, Ignis sighed.

"...Noct."

Ignis's hand was deliciously warm. Noctis couldn't help but roll his hips against him. His hand moved so smoothly along his length, grasping him firmly, gently, squeezing just a little at the base before drawing back. Ignis easily matched Noctis's eager rhythm but allowed himself to linger here, and there. His fingers brushed the coarse hair at the base of his dick. His thumb rolled again and again over the head, leaking, throbbing with need, slickening his cock even further. 

Ignis breathed hard. He drew his mouth open against Noctis's neck in a long, languid kiss. In return, Noct's hands dug into the advisor's back. Ignis gripped him harder. Noct's hips stuttered. His legs melted and the apartment whirled around him. He could only feel Ignis -- Ignis's hand pumping him steadily, Ignis's body pressed hard to his own, Ignis's breath heavy and hot and wet against his neck, Ignis whispering his name once and again, and again.

"A-aah--"

Noctis's body went stiff and weightless. He jerked, gasped, mouth agape with a silent shout. His hips thrust him into Ignis's grasp erratic and desperate. He cut his own moan and Ignis's shuddering breath with another hungry kiss. He couldn't stop. A fiery white flashed behind his eyes. Ignis's body flush to his. The warmth of his chest. Hot, thick white painted his warm, eager grasp. Ignis sighed against Noct's lips.

"Oh." Soft, uneven kisses found Noct's cheek, the side of his face, strands of dark hair, his brow graced with thin, cool sweat. His breath against Noct's ear sent a shiver through the prince, sending him floating in a new sea -- a sea of only Ignis, his voice and his warmth -- only, only Ignis. "...o-ohhh, Noct, I..."

The phone rang again. Its blaring seemed so, so far away. It rang from somewhere far outside Insomnia while, soon enough, Noctis eased against Ignis with a sigh. The ringing subsided at some point -- it didn't matter when. Noctis's arms were stiff wrapped around him. Ignis gently tried to move away, only for Noct to whine in complaint.

"Wait, don't--" He watched Ignis raise his hand. Noct's face burned at the sight of thick strands of white upon his fingers. His heart began to pound again, shuddering in his chest. "Oh. Uhh..."

Ignis's own eyes drifted to his hand. After a long moment's hesitation, punctuated by a sharp gasp from the prince, he brought a finger to his lips once again. Noct stared. Ignis closed his eyes. His lips parted just enough for his tongue to clean a finger. When his eyes opened again, he glanced to Noctis and, suddenly, looked away. He cleared his throat and readjusted his glasses with his other hand.

"...just a moment."

He went for the counter. The sink ran briefly and Ignis returned with a washcloth. He quickly cleaned the mess from his hand and then moved below Noct's waist. The prince bristled at the sudden cold. Ignis righted Noctis's pants and smoothed his shirt. Noct couldn't help but notice the stray strand of white that made its way to Ignis's shirt. He pointed uselessly, his voice uneven when he managed to speak.

"You, uh, missed some."

With a small smile, Ignis shook his head and patted the spot on his shirt. He readjusted his glasses again. His eyes wandered past Noctis. The prince could see a storm of thoughts behind his sharp green eyes. Noct could feel the same storm brewing in his mind, slowly drawing in the anxious tide. Before Ignis could move away again, Noct's arms wrapped around his waist. He buried his face in Ignis's shoulder. If he could only soak in his warmth for a little longer, he figured, maybe parting wouldn't hurt so much.

He couldn't find his voice. He couldn't find anything but his name as he held him tighter. "Ignis..."

Noct's hands dug into the young advisor's back. At any moment, he could drift away again. The line they crossed would be consumed by the sea of silence. He couldn't bring himself to meet Ignis's wary eyes. Ignis's gentle hand found his hair, smoothing messy dark strands. He nestled his head to his. Noct could feel his soft, gentle sigh throughout his own body.

"Sorry," Noct nearly hissed. He tried to steady himself with one deep breath, and another, but the warmth of his peak faded, threatening to give way to cold, brittle fear. Ignis chuckled quietly. The prince could feel his lips against his hair.  
"Please," he said voicelessly. He wrapped an arm around Noct's waist to hold him just as close. "There's no need to apologize."  
"But I..."  
"I'm here for you."

The words were soft but steady, quiet but sure.

"Whatever you might need, Noct, I am always, always--"

The phone rang again. And then it rang again. Each ring rippled through the warm apartment air. It was Noctis who finally gently pushed Ignis back, freeing himself from the counter and wobbling upon his own two feet. Ignis gave him a small nod before retreating to the door to retrieve his phone from his coat pocket. 

He cleared his throat and answered on what surely must have been the thirtieth ring. It didn't take long to answer -- he so easily assumed the tone appropriate of a royal official. Noct could still feel his lips on his, could still see the brief glimpse of his tongue upon his fingers. He shivered, replaying the sight behind his eyes again and again. Ignis soon returned his phone to his pocket and sighed.

"In any case," he said to Noct, flashing him a small smile, "we should be going soon."  
Noctis blinked. Of all the things he could have said, he only managed something small and useless. "...wanna make breakfast first, or something?"

Ignis gave pause. His eyes ventured away again -- toward the window, to the couch, to Noct's waist. The prince approached him slowly. Before Ignis could clear his throat again and speak, Noctis tugged at his shirt, tugging his attention to him and him alone.

"I'm here for you, too," he said quietly. The weight of Ignis's eyes, soft and gentle, but needing something, made him shrug and half chuckle. "I'll, uh. I'll make some coffee, okay?"  
Ignis smiled and nodded lightly. "Ah, I'd like that very much, indeed."

At some point, the rain had stopped. The city was quiet, and so was Ignis's phone. They didn't discuss what to have for breakfast. With the kitchen fully stocked once again, Ignis wordlessly set to work while Noct wrestled with the coffee. A different kind of silence thrummed through the too-big apartment. Noctis didn't find himself adrift in some silent, lonely sea. He didn't tell Ignis when the coffee was ready. He didn't say anything. He instead approached him and slipped his arms around his sides, hugging him close. He felt Ignis's sigh like it was his own. His gentle chuckle. His steady, careful hands grasping his own. His soft reminder they would be leaving soon. Leaving together.

Noctis still couldn't find the words for it. He didn't know when it started. He didn't know when he'd started longing for him, when he needed to feel his arms around him and pull him close. Maybe he didn't need words for it. He didn't bother wondering and worrying for the rest of the morning. Instead, he ate breakfast with Ignis and marveled at the lips that'd kissed him, the lips that spoke his name so sweetly, the warmth with which he'd reassured him so easily.

"I'm here for you. Whatever you need, Noct, I am always here."

He didn't need any more words than that.

**Author's Note:**

> (pounds table repeatedly) ignoct ignoct ignoct ignoct!
> 
> I really struggled writing this -- you know that kind of performance anxiety when you're writing something you feel is really important? I get so emotionally overwhelmed by these boys in general but ignis and noct is peak painful I'M SAD ALL THE TIME the mutual pining is (chefs kiss)
> 
> I wanted to at least complete this to try and get into gear for... the ignoct spiceathon going on on twitter because I wanna give that a shot. maybe. but in the meantime I am going to hurl myself into the sea once agaaAIIIINNN THANK YOU FRIENDS
> 
> (ps consider this needy noct time and next up will be needy ignis hehehehehehehhehehehehuhuhuheeerhgg)


End file.
